Monday, 3 June 2013


So I backspace the whole paragraph I wrote. It was a great night, with a little stress in daytime. Still, people who talked to me are the best. Thanks for the ears. Thanks a lot.

Sunday, 2 June 2013


People change. People can change in anytime, so do I. I wish I was the old me, the one who with smiles, laughs and joy. I miss the old me. I read a paragraph on Facebook which really inspired me. They said "People's comments are the biggest fear in life, so when you don't care bout it, what do you still afraid of?" I have no idea what was on my mind when I first saw it, but then I thought of everyone who comes and leaves. I miss them, every single of them. They changed, so they left. I'm moving on with my life without some of them, hmmm....I just miss them. I know everyone is growing up, going on with their life and future, but can we just stay the same in friendships? People change, one thing that bothering me most of the time. Some of them were so good to me last time until then I became nothing, I'm not around in their life anymore. I give calls, texts or even emails. How many people still replying? How many people still care bout it? How many people still remember me......I doubted.

They said it's a cycle, we were all strangers until we met, we became friends, then strangers again. This is life. I appreciate people who still staying with me until now, we might fought, we might argued, we might mad but we still love each others. How is it gonna be if everyone left? I'm standing alone. I guess. One close friend of mine, he left, he did. We were so close last time, we on the phone every night, we text everyday, we gay every moment but then he choose to leave. As a friend all I can do was just respect what he decided, so we stop contacting each others. Sometimes when I miss him, I give him a call and as expected the call will never gonna pick up by anyone. I know it rang, he was there, just that he doesn't want to pick it up. It hurts still. Dude, if you are reading this, I want to say that I miss you. I miss our friendship. Dear Jesus, if you can hear me please bless everyone of my friends, they are the best thing I ever have. Of course my family as well. Sometimes I doubt if I ever been miss.......I doubt.

Saturday, 1 June 2013

First night of June.

First night of June and I am feeling so tired about my heart. People never cherish when they are holding something in hand, until they lost it, they regret. What difference does regret makes? What difference does being sad makes? I'm a giver, I give a lot so I got hurt a lot. I am the kind of people who easily to forgive someone and forget the bad past tense. I thought I was supposed to have a happy life than people who remember every bad things in life. I guess I'm wrong again. I hate this feelings that I am having now. When I give, no one appreciate and when I don't, people starts complaining. This is life? I guess it is.